Communication skills are what make the difference between an effective manager and one who can inspire those around him/her.  Often, the manager who can communicate well with his/ her staff gets people to achieve more than they believed they could achieve themselves because of the support and openness which surrounds a relationship like this. 

All communication is made up of a sender, the message itself and the receiver.  While all three are obviously very important, it is the receiver's understanding of the message that will determine its effectiveness.  However, the underlying relationship between the sender and the receiver will often determine the success of the communication process.  If, for example, there is a poor relationship between the sender of the message and the person receiving it, this will affect the way in which the message is interpreted and heard.  This is one of the main reasons why communication is not an exact science as people and the relationship that exists between them will greatly affect the three elements outlined earlier.

Essential Elements for Effective Communications

The following are some of the essential elements which need to be in place in order for communications to be effective:

Clarity in the Message - the message should be concise and clear using language that is easily understood and clear to all involved. 

Understanding - try to understand the other person’s point of view before expressing your own point.  To do this with any real effect, the good communicator should be able to summarise the other person’s point of view to their satisfaction before outlining his/her view. This is quite different from merely saying “ I understand.” It involves summarising the other person’s point of view so that you capture the message and the feeling behind it before going on to your own view.

Belief and Confidence - A truly convincing communicator is one who believes in their own message and has confidence in themselves and their message when they are expressing this.  By being enthusiastic about the message, the receiver may mirror or copy, to some degree at least, the energy of the sender.

Openness - By developing an atmosphere of trust and openness, managers can really understand how their people are doing as well as establishing any barriers or difficulties they may be having in doing their jobs or the relationships they have with others.

Flexibility- An effective communicator is one who can adapt their style depending on who they are dealing with.  This ensures that the message gets through to the receiver in the way it was intended and the sender of the message is sensitive to the reactions of the receiver ie. judging body language, facial expressions and verbal responses.

Attitude - A belief in oneself and a positive attitude are essential attributes of an effective communicator.  In order to communicate with others effectively, a manager must firstly have a strong sense of self and a belief in his or her own capabilities and rights.  When this confidence exists, a manager is not trying to prove anything when dealing with someone else and can therefore behave more objectively and rationally in situations when dealing with others.

Purpose of Communication

What is the purpose of any form of interpersonal communication?

1. To ensure understanding- so that the message is understood in the way it was intended.  This includes reacting to all forms of feedback from the other person as the message is conveyed, both verbally and non-verbally.
2. To empathise or understand the other person’s point of view or feelings on an issue, regardless of how different they may be to your own.
3. To establish common ground or look for a Win / Win in every interaction.  How can both parties come away from the meeting feeling good and as though they have both gained something from the interaction?

Barriers to Effective Communication

There are a number of common barriers which make it more difficult for the communications process to work effectively.  These include the following:

Personal Bias or Prejudice – having pre-formed ideas about the subject or the message will affect the manner in which the message is heard and interpreted.

Poor Listening – most people believe themselves to be effective listeners although few people have ever been trained in this area.  In reality, it is often difficult to listen in a truly open way to another  persons’ message.

Feelings/Mood – how we are feeling will greatly affect the colour of the glasses or filters we wear when communicating with another person. For example, have you ever felt frustrated when listening or talking to someone when you were in a hurry or did not have the time to be there? 

By developing a number of key skills, a manager may feel better equipped to deal with situations which involve communicating with those he /she manages.  Some of the techniques which may be useful to employ include those in the following areas:

• Listening
• Giving Feedback
• Assertiveness
• Attitude
• Body language
• Get your Message across

Listening

As listening is a key communication skill which all communicators need to develop, it is worthwhile focusing on some techniques to improve listening skills. The following listening SOUNDS summarise the key skills which managers need to examine in themselves.

S          See - See the reactions of the other person in terms of their body language as well as what they may say.  Become sensitive to really reading the other person's response to the message.

O         Open - Be open to the differences that exist between people. Learn to value divergent views and opinions as well as personalities. Ask open questions to try to understand the message completely, both in content and the feeling behind it.

U         Understand - Understand the other person's view before expressing your own. 

N         Neutral - Stay neutral as a listener as far as possible because if you show strong agreement or particularly disagreement towards the other person, this will then affect the way they express their message.

D         Don’t interrupt – Don’t interrupt the speaker.  Allow him/her to finish what they have to say before speaking.  Try to summarise what they have said to their satisfaction before expressing your own views.

S          Don’t Change the Subject – Even if you are not as interested in the subject as the speaker, a good communicator will show he/she has understood the message before moving to another subject.

Giving Feedback

Finding people doing "right" is an approach which managers should become aware of as we all need to know what we are doing well. Here are some guidelines to giving feedback in an effective way:

• Focus on what you see – Be specific about the feedback you give, both positive and negative eg. You were late on three occasions last week , by 10 minutes, 15 minutes and 20 minutes. 
• Begin by asking the recipient of the feedback for their views on their own behaviour or performance.
• Give at least two positive points about the person’s behaviour.  Be specific about what the person has done well.
• Give two points about the changes that are needed in the person's behaviour. 
• Give factual information which focuses on the specific behaviour you saw.
• Neutral – Try not to make value judgements in the way you give feedback to others.  Keep the feedback neutral and do not become aggressive when outlining it to the other person.

Assertiveness

Assertiveness is a style of behaviour which is essential for an effective manager to adopt in dealing with others.  It differs from that of aggression largely due to the effect it has on other people.  Assertive behaviour stems from a belief in your own rights, but also a belief in the rights of those you communicate with.  It is a style of behaviour which commands respect from those who encounter someone who deals with them in this way.  An aura of confidence surrounds the person using this style of behaviour while they also make the person they communicate with feel valued and worthwhile, even in situations where the two views expressed are quite different.  In other words, this style stems from a belief in a win/win approach.

A useful technique when expressing yourself in an assertive way would be the BOFF approach which summarises the language and way of expressing yourself in an assertive way with other people.  This approach is summarised below:

B         Describe the behaviour of the other person in terms of what they said or did eg. You made a comment at the last divisional meeting about my department.

O         Resulting Outcome – State the outcome which resulted after the behaviour described.  The outcome of that was that it seemed I did not know what was going on in my department.

F          Outcome in terms of feelings – Express how you feel as a result of the behaviour eg. I feel very annoyed /upset about that.

F          Future – In future, what outcome /change do you want eg. In future, I would prefer if you would say it to me directly first.

By using the BOFF technique, you are expressing your point of view and articulating what you need to happen in the future to make the situation ok for you.  In adopting an assertive style, the following principles should also be considered.

1. Actively listen and show you understand as a first step in the conversation.
2. Say what you think or feel – focus on identifying the emotions that you experience and express these.
3. Say what you want to happen – Know the outcome you want, otherwise you are leaving the solution in someone else’s hands.

Attitude

The attitude which we have when dealing with others has a strong influence over the quality of the interpersonal communication which subsequently develops.  The following technique is one which can be a useful guide to those determined to keep the line of communication open, regardless of what they feel about the message they are about to hear.  The approach summarised is called the PIN approach which when used can ensure the line of communication is kept open.

P          Positive – Always give a first response which is positive if possible eg.

“That is an interesting idea .” This keeps the line of communication open and encourages the other person to continue outlining their views/ideas as they will feel that they are not being judged.

I           Interest – Show interest in the subject by asking questions to find out more about the person’s view.  These questions should be open eg. What, when, where, how, why?  This also gives the listener time to think as their own view is not expressed until the other person's position is completely understood.

N         Negative – Only give a negative response once you have heard and understood the person’s point of view.

By using the PIN approach to communication, managers will show that they have heard and understood the views of their people and where they are negative, they have firstly shown they have understood the other’s position.

Body Language

Body language are the silent messages which we transmit when communicating with others.  They are the powerful and often more real messages which say so much about how we are truly feeling as it is very difficult to mask non-verbally how we actually feel.  Body language includes gestures, facial expressions, posture and eye contact.  According to Albert Mehrabian, the following percentages of a message are conveyed non verbally:

7% - What you say

38% - How you say it

55% - How you look

In other words, the greatest part of any message is conveyed though the non-verbal elements, as opposed to the words used.  Therefore, managers who are successful communicators are sensitive to the non-verbal messages they receive from those around them and will often pick up the true meaning in what someone says by checking their understanding of these signals. 

Getting your Point Across

Whether expressing a point to one person or to a group, a key interpersonal skill which a manager needs is that of articulating his/her point of view in a manner that is clear and concise.  A technique which can provide a useful structure to do this is the OBC technique which is outlined below.

O         Opening – Express your viewpoint and be definite eg. " My view on the new proposals are…." Tell people what you are going to tell them.

In delivering a speech, this opening stage should also outline what the presenter is going to tell people during the talk.

B         Body – Outline 1-2 examples of why you hold the view you hold and be specific. ie. Tell them.

In a formal talk, outline the main argument /reasoning you have.

C         Conclusion – Summarise in a strong way your views ie. tell people what you told them.

In a more formal presentation, tell people what you told them.

By following this approach when expressing your views, whether formally or informally, the communication is easily understood and followed, as it is concise and clear.

Conclusion

These are some of the techniques which may help a manager to develop his/her interpersonal skills so that they ensure that they get the best out of the people they manage.  By recognising the importance of really understanding the other person’s point of view and focusing on this end result, the communication skills and techniques become more worthwhile as often immediate benefits result from their use.  Finally, as a manager, it is your role to develop good interpersonal relations with those you are responsible for.  Some people may require a variety of approaches before you relate well with and understand them. I believe whether we are listeners or speakers, we should make ourselves responsible for ensuring understanding, which is the key to successful communications and better relationships overall.  

Jenny Hayes, Head of Ibec Academy